In Praise of Quantity Time

I don't believe in "quality time." Time is just time. I think the phrase came about in the eighties, when it became hip for yuppies to ignore their puppies and work a lot, then spend a little bit of "quality time" with the kids, and call it good. If you don't spend a lot of time with someone, and especially if you feel a bit guilty about that, things can quickly descend into the "we're having fun, damnit," frame of mind, and we all know that ain't good. I'm sure I'm not the first person to say this.

When you dis "quality time," though, I think it's time to praise, "quantity time." Quantity time is when you spend so much time with someone, you know you can be your true self. Quantity time is keeping it real. Quantity time is getting bored and exploring that feeling, and then getting more bored, and watching tv or eating burritos or working or drinking or playing music or roller skating... whatever. Just time. Time. Time. Time. Time.

There's nothing wrong with making your children sick of you, your relatives, your lovers, or even your friends. That's what friends are for, right? (Some of you are now thanking God, Buddha, Gaia, Allah or the Grand Zombiegod now that I moved out to distant Wisconsin, aren't you?) Anyone I ever cared about, now or before, we spent a lot of quantity time together. A lot. And anyone I went out with a few times and had a great time doing that wonderful quality time stuff, I don't remember their names. I just remember the cool thing with old what's-her-face. But if I have seen a few thousand Star Trek, Star Trek the Next Generation, Star Trek Deep Space Nine, and whatever the next one is called Star Trek episodes with my immediate family, in spite of honestly not being that into it, well, you know, we had that quantity time. Good, wholesome, quantity time. Like it should be.

But isn't it funny how, when you take time to get bored with someone, something always happens. Eventually.

Such is life. Life is just a heap of quantity time. You can't waste it. Time can't be wasted, just spent, however and with whomever you choose. It never stops.





  1. I agree with you 100 per... wait! You don't like Star Trek?! What?

  2. I liked the first one, with William Shatner and Leonard Nemoy, but it was for the camp value. It was so bad it was good. As for all of the spin offs, they either weren't bad enough or weren't good enough- I'm not sure. But I'll watch any of them with you:)