Conversation with my husband in the car:
Me: "I think if we get the blinds, we should get two, because it would look weird to just have one."
Brian: _______ [Silence with a devious look.]
Me: ________ [Laughing, because I think I know what he's thinking.*]
Brian: "Oh, did I say that out loud?" [Laughing.]
Me: "No, you didn't, actually."
Me: "You really didn't say anything."
Then, it dawned on me, that was perfect! How confusing! How amazing! How ridiculous!
The next time you're quiet for a while, just wait a bit, and then say, "Oh, did I say that out loud?" And then let your dear friend wonder what horrible thoughts were going through your mind that you didn't actually say.
Minions, it's a tough job, but you're up to it. You have the patience, the stamina, the temperament, the keen social skills. Go forth and befuddle!
* "Worst dinner ever," that's what he was thinking. That's a Buck Dollars joke. Don't pay any attention. Sorry.