More political theorizing by a mindless minion

I have a theory about John McCain, which I reallly hope is true, but I suppose that only John McCain himself knows.

It starts eight years plus ago. I know this is ancient history now, but I'd like you to remember, for just a moment, who John McCain was eight years ago, when he ran against George Bush. He was really interesting. He had a lot of great ideas about campaign finance reform, abortion, and the environment, ideas which the other Republicans were not really willing to talk about. He was a maverick. I was planning on voting for him if he won the nomination. (I can hear your virtual gasp. Yes, I, mindless minion number 2.703, was planning once on voting for a Republican for president.)

Fast forward six years, to two years ago, and something really bizarre happened. John McCain became a different person. He started voting with George Bush on everything. Everything. Everything. He stopped talking campaign finance reform. He voted that torturing our prisoners was okay. He, who was himself tortured and an advocate of all of those ever tortured, he voted that we, the U.S., COULD TORTURE. He hugged George Bush, whom he formerly hated - and I mean really, really hated him. He even said that Roe vs. Wade should be overturned! And then he nominated this psycho fundamentalist cookoo brain for V.P.? What the?

My theory is this: he really, really wants to be president, and two years ago, John McCain decided to do anything it takes to win, and I do mean anything it takes. And then, once he's in office, the old, true McCain will return.

That's my theory.

But since only McCain knows what McCain is thinking, and since McCain made all of those horrible votes in the Senate, and since Barack Obama is supposedly the most liberal voter in the Senate, I am definitely voting for Obama!


  1. I think he's just gone crackers.

  2. I think, if elected, McCain will turn out to be our second president who was suffering from the early stages of Alzheimer's disease while in office.
    I remember liking John McCain a lot at the time that he was trying to get the nomination eight years ago. I have never seriously considered voting for a Republican, not for president, but I might have been persuaded. But now he's a crackpot.

  3. I'm afraid you're probably both right, and I'm just being a Lemony Snicket optimist again.